People at work.

I went to work today and the people there haven't seen me in like 2 weeks. Some thought I quit (I've been saying I would) and others said I got fired. Which would never happen cause I'm that dam good(yes I'm cocky). Then 2 people thought I died. Only one person came to a right state of mind and said he's on a vacation.

Here's something funny I read:

(281): How do you jack off and text at the same time?
(1-281): On my iPhone they have an app for that